What I wish I would have known before giving birth

After giving birth to multiple children (not all at the same time luckily) and both natural- and by that I mean the redheaded's wimp way with an epidural but the baby coming out of where it's supposed to, and C-section, let me share a few things with you that I wish I would have known before going to the hospital.
First let me just say that after you have your first baby you're a little more prepared for the next.  And if you experience this first issue it is something that will traumatise you and burn in your head so you never forget-

1) Take a stool softener after giving birth.
              My first baby was born vaginally (that word will become more normal after being pregnant) and no one had told me to take a stool softener.  Well a day or two after having her I was home and needed to have my first BM.  HOLY COW!  Let me just tell you I'm pretty sure it was the closest I've ever been to natural non-medicated child birth.  I'm pretty sure the exiting tore something on it's way out.  After a few minutes on the toilet realizing the process was only going to get worse I debated if there was a way to stop it and find a solution........ I remember wondering if there was anything I could do to make it magically turn into diarrhea.  These were thoughts of pure desperation however and after making more noise and shedding more tears than I did in labor it was over and I swore I wasn't going to eat anything for a week so I wouldn't have to go through it again! It was my longest and most painful trip to the bathroom. This of course was about the time my mom realized she forgot to have me take a stool softener........  So ask for one at the hospital or take your own!

2)  Make sure you can buy the same binki the hospital uses or bring your own.
               My first baby was a binky baby all the way and when you're at the hospital they give you 2.  Well it wasn't until a few months later that one was lost and in fear of losing the other one we went to buy more only to find the stores didn't sell the same one!  We tired a couple other kinds but by then our baby was not going to have anything but what she was used to.  Needless to say I ended up going back to the hospital and explaining the situation to the nurses and asked if I could have a couple more.  The desperation of a mom showing up at the hospital months later to ask for another freebie was the first time I ever felt like a druggie begging for another fix.

3) Bring a thank you gift (preferably something food) for the doctor and nurses.
              My second child was born the day before Father's day and my mom had a tradition of making these mini pumpkin bread loafs for all the dads in our ward.  Since there was some left over she brought them to me at the hospital so I could give them to the doctor and nurses.  Let me just say- after giving those gifts I was EVERYONE's favorite patient!!!  Nurses were bending over backwards to help me or get me anything, they double or tripled me up on some of the freebies (including binki's-see above).  Ever since I have always made sure to make a treat for them and bring it with me to the hospital.

4) It's really okay to let the nurses have the baby in the nursery while you sleep.
             I promise the chances of going home with the wrong baby or having something happen to your baby are VERY slim, contrary to all the Lifetime movies about those things happening that you probably watched the entire pregnancy.  With my first I didn't want to let her out of my sight.  She was almost always in my room right next to my bed.  But then with my other babies I realized the nurses had just as much if not more experience as I did and they also had the special medical knowledge that I did not.  So I was comfortable sending the baby to the nursery while I slept.  The nurses will bring the baby back when it's hungry, or when you ask them to.  It's not like you're turning over custody or anything.  Think of them as highly qualified and experienced babysitters.

5) Stay at the hospital for as long as possible!
            Again, with my first baby I was ready to get home and as soon as we had our 24 hour check by the Dr. we were out the door, even though our insurance would pay for 2 more days.  Lesson learned on the next babies however.  I don't know if it was the fact of having to go home to another child and having to actually do stuff or the convincing of my mom but I stayed at the hospital for as long as possible.  It was like a mini-vacation (minus the pain, bleeding, and uncomfortable bed).  Those extra couple of days at the hospital were amazing.  Having the help of nurses as needed, meals brought to me, and no schedule or anyone to really demand anything of me gave me the time to slowly return to life and bond with the new baby.  I was able to put myself together sort of speak without a rush or any demands or stress.  Then by the time I went home it was like I had a week jump start at getting things going.  I would dare say it speeds up recovery time drastically.

6) Don't be afraid to ask for help.
           The nurses are there to help you, they want to help you.  And sometimes it's more safe to have them help you.  It's their job, you are not an imposition.  If you happen to have a nurse that treats you less than nice, just ask for a supervisor to switch your nurse.  Or when a shift change happens make a request to not have that nurse the next shift.  Chances are you will get at least one amazing nurse that you will look forward to her shift.   But back to asking for help- it's really ok.  It doesn't mean you're going to be a horrible mom, or that you are a complainer.  If there's something your husband or whoever is at the hospital with you can't do or doesn't know about then by all means call the nurse.

7) Treat your nurses kindly.
          Be grateful, treat them kindly and with respect and they will do the same for you.  If you are one of those women who screamed, yelled and called everyone in the delivery room a horrible name while wishing everlasting misery on their heads you may want to apologise.  However, chances are nurses and doctors have heard and seen it all and at this point don't take it personally, especially if you are nice and grateful afterwards.  Be sure to thank them.  I don't know about you but I'm always more willing to do something for someone who's always showing gratitude than someone who never does.

8) Don't try to be a tough guy.
           You aren't a guy, and in fact any guy would be begging for an epidural if they too had to go through labor.  It's ok to have medicine to help take away the pain.  And after giving birth don't try to ride out the pain.  I rarely take medicines so with my first I thought I could take it only as necessary.  Well let me save you some discomfort and say for the first 2 days or so it's necessary!  Take the pain meds before they wear off and keep it in your system rather than waiting until you feel pain and playing catch up.  After the first couple of days you can wait and see how much pain you're in, but as soon as you feel any twinge of pain take something because it'll take 30 minutes or so for the meds to kick in and that's a LONG 30 minutes when you're in pain.

9) Ice packs put where?
           With my first I had torn during delivery and so had an episiotomy- which is basically stitches where the tares were. When the nurse first suggested putting an ice pack on the stitches I was taken back.  But trusting the nurse I tried it and oh my amazing relief!  It helped with the pain so well I asked for some extra ice packs from the hospital (the kind that aren't cold until you pop a little bag inside and shake them up)  I used them for probably the first week after having the baby- even after I was off pain meds because it gave a localized relief.

10) Make freezer meals before going to the hospital.
            Once you get home from having the baby you're not going to feel 100% for a couple weeks, even though you will gradually feel much better and want to do more and more each day, doing too much too fast will slow down recovery time and even make your bleeding start up again or extend.  So you want to take it easy.  Even if you have friends and family bringing you meals the longer you can go without having to make something the better!  So while I was pregnant with my second baby the last couple of months of the pregnancy I started making freezer meals.  Not only were they handy on those days when I was too tired to make dinner, but they were awesome to come home from the hospital to and know I didn't have to make dinner for awhile.  All I did was make 3-5 times more than I normally would any time I was already making something for dinner that would freeze well.  Casseroles, lasagna, enchiladas, etc.  Then I'd pack up the extra into freezer and oven safe disposable containers, label them and pop them in the freezer.  They were so easy to reheat for dinner my husband could prepare them, and they were much more healthy than fast food or store bought freezer foods.

Those are the top 10 things I wish I would have known and done before having my first baby.  Hopefully they will help you!